Another life-changing phrase came from my angel brother Terrance. In one of our typically lengthy discussions about four years ago, he said to me, "When we react to a situation, we create chaos; but when we think first, we almost always make a different choice that creates peace." I found this such a profound statement, and it became another lesson for me. Now I use this phrase often to help me deal with whatever challenges pop up, and those that test my patience and resolve to be kind and to do the right thing—especially when I want to do otherwise! Putting this phrase into action requires a measure of time to think before we react out of frustration and anger. Therefore, I promise that this phrase will also become familiar to you in time and you contemplate on it. Also, I believe it will become a "smooth stone" (like in the David and Goliath story in the Bible) to help you deal with difficult situations of your own.

Phrase 3: "People Mirror What We Need To Know!"

One phrase Terrance uses often is: "If you feel you have to defend yourself, then you’ve already lost the battle." Another phrase (which Terrance coined and uses frequently) is helpful as well: "People mirror what we need to know about ourselves.™" I appreciate all these phrases. Since then, I’ve noticed that children are best at mirroring back our attitudes. They always seem to pick up on the negatives we think and feel and then send it back to us with their own attitudes attached. Children bounce back what they hear us say as well, which we usually do not realize we have said. This gives us a good opportunity to think about what we say, and perhaps change what we say and how we say it.

Phrase 4: "You Can’t Change What People Want To Think!"

The last phrase came from my angel friend Jim Wart, who is my most favorite "wart" in the world. He said, "You cannot change what people think if that is what they want to think, because they will only hear what they want to hear." Do you have any idea how many times I have been upset over situations because I did not know this simple concept? And do you know how many times you have done the same thing because you didn’t know this either?

Actually, Jim used another phrase as well, which basically means the same thing: "People will believe what they want to believe, and nothing you say will change that no matter how hard you try." Now that I'm getting better at this, when I am alerted to the fact that people have made up their minds about something, I stop right there and say nothing more. There is no benefit in talking to a closed mind. It also helps to know that some people argue just for the sake of arguing. They do it to get a rise out of you, to exercise their need for a debate, or to have more control. This is not the type of situation that lends itself to a peaceful resolution, unless you know what they are doing and can put a stop to it or you know how to play along without it getting to you.

I hope these phrases have helped you as much as they helped me. It certainly makes you think about it anyway. I would like to know you comments about this and if you have had experiences much like these. Contact me by clicking on the envelope in the navigaitonal bar.